I’ve been navigating the job market after a series of layoffs, and one of the toughest challenges I’ve faced is the lack of support from former coworkers when it comes to professional references. I’ve developed a thick skin regarding rejection from recruiters, but it’s been disheartening to reach out to people I thought I had good relationships with, only to be met with silence or polite refusals. They often say something like, "I don’t know your work well enough to recommend you," which I understand, but it still stings. I’m not asking for anyone to exaggerate my skills; I just want an honest account of our time working together. It’s especially difficult when my last job didn’t leave me in a strong position for references. As an entry-level assistant, I didn’t have much influence over my relationships with managers, so I’ve relied on peers for references. While a few have been supportive, it feels like they are the exception rather than the rule. It’s frustrating, especially in a culture where employers expect multiple references. I’ve spoken with friends from other countries who are surprised by this reluctance, as providing references is often seen as a normal courtesy there. I’m left wondering if this is just the standard workplace culture in the US or if I’m missing something.