Today, I had my first interview in a long time, and I feel like I completely blew it. After deciding to look for a new job, I sent out several CVs and was excited when I finally got an interview opportunity. However, I wasn't entirely sure if I wanted the position, but I hoped the interview would change my mind. Unfortunately, it turned into a disaster. I was extremely nervous, and it showed. When they asked me to "tell us about yourself," I froze and ended up just repeating what's on my CV. I could sense that one of the interviewers was laughing at me, which really hurt. In my last job, I was able to showcase my skills, which I felt more comfortable with. Leaving the interview, I was on the verge of tears and ended up lighting my first cigarette in months. I'm determined to improve and prepare better for future interviews, but I can't shake the feeling of disillusionment with the whole process. It feels so performative, and it's hard to take it seriously. Just needed to vent a little about this experience.