I've been out of work for 3 years now after completing a Master's degree in engineering that I absolutely hated. I spent 5 years on this degree, including a year in industry, and while I graduated with a 2:1, the experience was far from enjoyable. I faced two mental breakdowns during this time, one during my internship and another shortly after, which really took a toll on my motivation. After finishing university, I was on strong antidepressants and struggled to find the drive to look for a job, despite having the skills for software development. I thought I could take a year to work on personal projects, but the rise of AI and widespread layoffs crushed my hopes of finding a stable career. Now, I'm three years unemployed. I did manage to earn some money through freelance work, around £2000 for a single project, but it wasn't stable. Employers seemed uninterested in my personal projects, and I realize now that I should have been applying for any job available, regardless of the skill level. Anxiety and depression have made job searching a daunting task for me, and I often find myself overwhelmed and distracted. I've worked minimum wage jobs before, like as a pot wash and cleaner, but those experiences were traumatic and left me feeling hopeless. I know I have skills to offer, but the two-year gap on my CV has led to me being ghosted by employers. I thought about volunteering to fill my CV, but I spent that time on projects I believed would be beneficial. Now I'm in a tough spot. I need a job by Christmas, and while I’ve applied to apprenticeships, I keep getting ignored. I’m considering taking any job available, but I'm worried about my mental health and lack of joy in life. I haven't traveled or seen friends in years, and I feel like I'm running out of time to turn things around. I also tried to start a business based on some personal projects, but it became overwhelming and financially burdensome. I’m still in debt from university and struggling to get by. I just need an opportunity to prove what I can do.