Today was incredibly challenging for me at my job. I work in a role that requires public speaking, and this week we had an all-staff day where I was supposed to present for 15 minutes about my role. I’ve struggled with severe public speaking anxiety for a long time, and I had communicated this to my manager weeks in advance, asking for a plan to help manage my anxiety during the presentation. Unfortunately, I didn't feel supported, and despite my repeated concerns, I was told I would be fine. On the day of the presentation, I felt physically ill—my throat was burning, my heart raced, and I was sweating. I was supposed to have a break before my presentation to talk to my manager about my panic attack, but they moved my presentation forward unexpectedly. I panicked and went to the back to inform the CEO, but I ended up having a full-blown panic attack and had to leave the room. My manager eventually found me and suggested I skip my presentation, but I was still in distress. She told me to go home, which I did, feeling completely defeated and sick. I’ve been thinking about the potential consequences of what happened, and I’m really worried about how my manager will react when she calls me tonight. I just hope that there won’t be any repercussions for something I communicated about in advance. It’s been such a rough day.
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