fajitaben's journey

I'm at a crossroads with my job, and it's terrifying. For the past six years, working in the financial sector has been a constant source of stress, impacting my physical and mental health. I've lost interest in everything, struggled to maintain relationships, and dating feels impossible. I've come to realize that my self-esteem has plummeted, and I keep asking myself whether staying in this job is better for me than leaving. The answer is clear: I need to leave, but I'm uncertain about my next steps. Before finance, I was a podcast producer and host, a role I landed through a connection. I have a diverse skill set, including junior software development, data analysis, and media production, but these jobs are hard to come by. My plan is to start driving around town to apply for jobs in person, as this method has worked for me in the past. I usually get offers within a day or two when I do this, but I'm still scared. I'm tired of not utilizing my skills and have considered going out on my own, but I lack clarity on what that would look like. I thrive on variety and movement, recalling happier times when I juggled multiple gigs while working at FedEx and pursuing my podcasting and improv hobbies. I'm ranting because I think I'm going to quit tomorrow. I've tried searching for jobs while working, but it's been overwhelming. After applying to about 1,000 jobs and only landing six interviews, I feel clouded and anxious. I've been on medical leave for three weeks, and the thought of returning to that toxic environment feels impossible. I know this job is secure, but I can't keep sacrificing my well-being for it. Thanks for listening.