I was laid off about two years into my first job at a government-regulated private company that had a reputation for stability, having not had layoffs in the past 20 years. The news hit us like a ton of bricks; we were all caught off guard when we received the call and lost access to our accounts just 30 minutes later. It was a shocking experience that really shook my confidence. Fortunately, I managed to secure a high-paying contract just two months after the layoff, and after six months, I was converted to a full-time position. My manager and coworkers have been supportive, consistently giving me positive feedback, but I can't shake the feeling of unease. I constantly worry about budget cuts and what management might be thinking about my performance. Being in a male-dominated field adds to my anxiety. I've often found myself as the only woman in meetings filled with 15 or more men. While everyone has been kind, I feel the pressure to prove my worth and make myself indispensable, which has made me more competitive and overwhelmed than necessary. I never felt this sense of impending doom at my first job, and I wonder if these feelings will ever go away. How can I regain a sense of security in my job?
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