Hungry-Helicopter-46's journey

I’ve been working at my current job for 8 years, and I’m feeling completely overwhelmed. I need to leave, but I’m stuck because I don’t have any references that I can use. I work as a clinician, and after about 3 years in this position, my schizoaffective disorder and Crohn's disease started to take a toll on my performance. While I managed to fulfill my duties, my erratic behavior during flare-ups likely made my bosses uncomfortable. They’re good people, but I’ve seen them not recommend others they didn’t like, so I’m worried they won’t support my future job applications. I’ve applied for several positions, but every single one requires direct supervisor recommendations, and I can’t even ask my coworkers for help. It feels like I’m in a no-win situation. I’m terrified that I’ll have to stay in this job forever, and I’m considering going back to school again to change my career path. I just don’t know what to do next.