I just started a new job three days ago, and honestly, I'm feeling really down about it. I'm 23 and fresh out of college, and this is my third job in less than two years. I left my first job to focus on my thesis, and I quit my second job because the boss's treatment was unacceptable. After that, I lost a lot of motivation and spent time helping my mom and working on personal projects. I was also hoping to get a scholarship for a master's in Interior Design or Fashion Design, but I didn't get into either program. I applied to many jobs out of guilt for not being enrolled in anything or working, and finally, one company called me back. I wasn't as excited as I pretended to be, and now that I'm here, I feel miserable. I know I might sound like a spoiled brat, but being in the office all day makes me really sad, especially since I can't see my family until night. We live in a dangerous area, so I worry about both of us being out alone, especially after a scary incident last night. I've only been at this job for less than a week, and I've already cried about it multiple times. I applied out of guilt, feeling like I needed to have my life figured out by now. It's a standard office job, ten hours a day, Monday through Friday, and the atmosphere is pretty gloomy. I wake up at 3 or 4 am to get ready and get there by 7, and with gas prices rising, I'm worried about how much I'll spend each month. I guess I just thought my life would be different at this point. The idea of doing this for the next 30 to 40 years is overwhelming. I'm torn between wanting to continue my education to start my own business or pursue my dreams, and the pressure to just do something that others expect of me.
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